As always, I woke up this morning. My days usually start out this way. I like the predictability of it. It took me awhile to actually get out of bed. I think I spent about 15 minutes convincing myself to get up and get moving instead of resetting my alarm. I reset my alarm anyway and got out of bed 30 minutes later.I swung immediately into action and started on the 3 hour process of baking bread. During the first rise, I showered and attempted to dress myself. "Attempted" is the best word I can conjure up for what happened this morning. I spent time looking for clothes that I couldn't find, putting on and taking off clothes that didn't quite fit the way I wanted them to, and feeling utterly frustrated by the amount of time it was taking me to get dressed. I stomped my foot and exhaled loudly. I threw my arms up and threw my clothes on the ground. I couldn't do it. I couldn't dress myself. I walked away from my closet wearing a shirt and pants that didn't match. In my brain I fumbled about, letting self-destructive thoughts take hold.
It was then that I found myself standing in front of Dave; mismatched with my hair dried funny. He looked at me with the complete acceptance of a person who loves you so much they see past your awkward moments. Unaware of the temper tantrum I had in the other room, he asked how I was doing. I fumbled around in my brain again, then confessed "I'm having a bad morning." He asked why. "I can't dress myself," I replied.
I can imagine it would sound silly to hear a grown person say that they can't dress themselves, but Dave didn't laugh. He walked towards me and pulled me close. I cried as he held me. There's something about being held while you're crying, it's like someone else takes the responsibility of making sure you don't burst apart physically while you're bursting apart emotionally.
Even though it was a silly thing to cry about, it meant a lot to me to have Dave there. I just wanted to take a minute to thank him and all my friends who have loved me even when my clothes have not matched. I love you.
4 comments:
Okay, I already liked the guy...but this just is the icing on the cake! I heart you Dave :) What a great feeling to have someone love you like that!
And if you thought having mismatched clothes was bad...just try being busted for wearing the same outfit 3 (um, or more) days in a row. Ouch.
I know the feelings and it's so good to have a person who can love you through it. Thanks for sharing. And good job Dave!
i can totally identify with this. how is it that one day, an outfit can so easily come together, then the next day, I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO WEAR and MUST GO SHOPPING NOW! way to be there, dave.
I did go shopping with my mom when I was 10 ,but my problem was I can't match the cloth I choose.I will never know how to match and now Im 19. Im afraid I will never go to shopping by myself Im mean I still don't know how to match.even counting money or how much to give.it's a embarrassing I feel like I didn't know nothing when I was little.it look like I met for nothing.My Wish Was If I have learn to match and learn how to count money and reading & math too.so I can help my sister and getting new house for my parents.oh my God I do have a plan it's like Im helping out! if I have the job to work to make some money I can help my parents.even I didn't dream about that ,but I can make something new.it's like this girl from the magazine she say,she buy a house for her parents.I saw a house and it was beautiful.I feel like I wanna do the samething for my parents.and that a wonderful idea that I ever do for them.
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